Seven Five Year-Olds

Carrie [1] is five years old and lives with her mum and dad in social housing in town. She is an only child, and her home life feels calm, orderly, and predictable. Compared to many families around them, Carrie’s parents are doing reasonably well. Both are in employment, their housing is secure, and the household is able to meet its bills without the constant fear of things tipping over. From the outside, Carrie’s childhood looks steady and well‑supported.

Living in social housing makes a significant difference to the family’s finances. Their rent is lower and their tenancy more secure than it would be in the private sector. After housing costs and tax, the household has around £476 a week in equivalised disposable income, or just over £27,000 a year [i]. This puts them in a more comfortable position than lower‑income families (around 60% of households are worse off), but not one where they can afford to relax completely. Living in Shetland still comes with higher costs, particularly for food and everyday essentials.  Their energy demand is relatively low, but it’s still far higher than an equivalent home connected to the mains gas network [ii].  Careful budgeting remains part of daily life.  However, they can just about afford the additional 30% it costs to live an acceptable standard of living in Shetland, compared to a UK Mainland urban area [iii].

Carrie’s parents are able to manage. The weekly supermarket shop is affordable, although rising prices are noticed. They can afford for Carrie to go swimming regularly, and once a year they travel south to visit family—an expense that requires planning but feels important for maintaining connections. Unexpected costs are manageable, and there is a sense of stability that many local families lack.

But this security masks deeper challenges. Carrie’s dad struggles with poor mental health linked to alcohol dependency and long‑standing trauma from his own childhood. By his teenage years, he had already experienced self-harm and low self‑worth, and alcohol became a way of coping. Over time, this has shaped his life, spending habits, and relationships. Wanting to keep up with friends, with a new car with personalised number plates, new clothes and household gadgets.  He found it difficult to say no, building up significant credit card debt without his wife’s knowledge.

When the debt finally came to light, it was a shock that put immense strain on the household. With support from Carrie’s mum, he sought help from the Citizens Advice Bureau, and the family now has a repayment plan in place. Keeping up with the payments is hard, even with a reasonable income. The debt has reshaped their choices and their future plans. It is likely that having a second child was never really an option, given the financial and emotional pressures they are managing.

Carrie’s mum works hard to shield her from these difficulties. She masks many of the challenges at home, determined to prevent the cycles of instability and low confidence that shaped Carrie’s dad’s upbringing from being passed on. But this is a strain on her too, as she balances work, family life, and the constant effort of holding things together.

For Carrie, childhood feels safe and reassuring. She benefits from routine, opportunity, and a predictable home environment. Yet her story shows that even families who appear to be doing well may be carrying hidden burdens. Stability, in this case, is real, but it is carefully maintained, fragile, and dependent on continued support and understanding.